thoughts.


It’s really annoying
September 16, 2008, 2:48 am
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To not know what you’re good at. I’ve heard that everyone is good at something, you just have to find it.
But it just sucks to think one thing, and then doubt it. Especially if that’s what you want to be good at.
Maybe I’m just lacking confidence.



Poem
August 11, 2008, 6:23 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

Nobody is free.

Even birds are chained

to the sky.

As for me, I’m chained to this depression.

Unknown Author.



To eat or not to eat
August 7, 2008, 6:10 pm
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Ramen noodles with a fork or a spoon.

Mmmm, my favorite kind in a cup.



There’s nothing to do…
August 4, 2008, 3:17 am
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So it’s my best friends birthday. I went to her family BBQ and to see her get her piercing. And as much as I love hanging out with her and her pretty much boyfriend, watching telly before 10h30 isn’t too fun. What do I do?



I’ve never really stopped to think of the marvel

that shrunken heads are. How does one get bones so tiny?

Today is my dad’s birthday. He told me to ‘buy something for myself, have him pay for it, and that he would feel good because he bought me something’. But I didn’t want to do that, so yesterday, after filling out an application at Target, I walked around.

Originally, I had wanted to buy him some SkullCandy headphones for when he’s mowing the lawn. I’ve heard that is a very horrible chore to do, and I am glad I have never had to do it. But, no job, no money. So I thought, okay, if not the $50 ones, the $30 black ones. But my mother did not want to pitch in. I almost considered the $15 ones, but I will wait until Christmas or something. I’ll most likely have money.

I ended up buying him a package of Starbuck’s Dark Expresso Chocolate. This morning, my two younger sisters and I gave him the cards, and we ended up watching The Birzzare Foods show and Samantha Browns on the Travel channel. Which just reminded me of the movie Amelie. Amelie knows that her father has always wanted to travel, and gives the gnome to a flight attendant to take pictures all over the place and send postcards to her dad, which eventually inspires him to take off.

It kind of went down hill when my mom came home around..2ish? It was just akward and silent, except for the Mexican music playing in the background. Eventually, my dad retreated to the basement when my mom had finished grilling and came in to eat.

I wish my family was a family.

So I’m going to not think about that for a while and I will try to fnd information on how to shrink heads. I would imagine my next quest would be finding an object to attempt at shrinking.

If anyone actually sees this post, help, please?



Avocados are fruits.
July 8, 2008, 3:36 pm
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the wonders of the world. i have to start paying more attention to things like that.

i don’t have bones of glass. i can handle throwing myself at life.
 



Well my 4th of July sucked.
July 6, 2008, 11:22 pm
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Is this some kind of message?

 

Anyway, it’s Sunday and I am here at my aunt’s again. This time, I’m having a better time. Not everyone is here from before, but my dad is. He brought some Bacardi Mojito Pomegrante (spelled wrong) and they were delicious. Much funner drinking with the family than it was on Friday.

It sounds stupid, but honestly, I’m a family person. I want my close, blood family to be together. I guess that’s kind of selfish though. One of the reasons is so I don’t have to choose. Living all together, we kind of still are choosing… I’m ready to write to Oprah.



I love surprises.
June 20, 2008, 3:09 am
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I really do. The only problem is that it kills me to know I have one, but not exactly know what it is.

It’s worse when there’s TWO.

Oh, the suspense.

Really, the only thing that sucks is that they get me so excited, and when they are revealed, it is not the image I had conjured in  my head.

 

Come on, I know there’s a golden gecio (even though I was hoping snake) and some weed SOMEWHERE!



Buddha?
May 31, 2008, 8:14 pm
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She’s coming home!



unpredicted summer vacation.
May 31, 2008, 8:01 pm
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It looks like my new summer friends are Maury and Steve Wilkos. I spend my summer vacation mornings with them. Sometimes I go to the hospital and get stethescopes. My afternoons consist of preparing food for my sisters. I end my night with my littlest sister sleeping in my bed.

I had forgotten about the flies that always get in the house during the summer. The ones that you hear always when you’re laying in bed, unsure if you should try and sleep or try to find something to go again, only to reach the kitchen and get some piece of food you really didn’t want.

With my mom in the hospital, I am at my house more than before. And it’s scary- I feel like my mom!

No one listens to her, why would they to me? My younger sisters sometimes do, but the bitchy 13 year old can go to hell. She’s useless. Unless the ability to lounge around and think about herself is some soft of talent the world needs.

Yeah, there is always a bright side to things. I just don’t feel they’re that bright though. I mean now I have an excuse not to work-out of the house. And I get to… spend time with my sisters? I can… erm, save money.

 

If only…